Recently, I was talking to a longtime friend about his next career move.

He was describing a role that sounded great on paper – senior title, big move up, the kind of job that plays well at cocktail parties. Everyone in his field would’ve called it a “dream job” – the kind of career-capping role others would applaud.

But I could hear hesitation in his voice. It didn’t sound like he really wanted it.

So I asked him one question:
“Is that the job you want – or the job your ego wants?”

He called me a couple of weeks later and confessed that my question had been ringing in his head.

Upon reflection, he told me, he’d concluded he really didn’t want this job at all.

His ego had clouded his thinking.

That moment stuck with me.

We all make career decisions for a mix of reasons: ambition, recognition, stability, meaning. But we rarely stop to separate what we want from what our ego wants.

So I built a simple tool to help people do that:
I call it The Job Fit Matrix.

It’s a 2×2 that will change how you see your work.

The Job Fit Matrix is based on getting to the heart of two questions:
1️⃣ Is this the job you truly want?
2️⃣ Is this the job your ego wants?

The answers create four quadrants, each with its own story.

🟩 Dream Job

Job you want: Yes

Job your ego wants: Yes

When what you want and what your ego want are aligned, you hit the sweet spot.
You love the work and you’re proud of it.
It’s fulfilling and it looks good on paper.

The danger? Taking it for granted.
Alignment doesn’t last forever. It has to be renewed as you and your ambitions evolve.

🟥 Danger Zone

Job you want: No

Job your ego wants: Yes

This is where my friend realized he was headed.

It’s the job your ego loves, but your heart doesn’t.
It looks great on LinkedIn.
People congratulate you for landing it.
And yet… it feels like you’re performing someone else’s definition of success.

This is where burnout and job doldrums are significant risks.

Seeking or landing a job in the Danger Zone isn’t a failure; it’s feedback.

And a warning shot.

🟨 Paying Dues

Job you want: No

Job your ego wants: No

Sometimes a job is a bridge.
You take it to pay the bills, build runway, or gain experience.

It’s the proverbial job in the mailroom as a foot in the door.

(reality check: are there even mailrooms anymore?)
There’s no shame in that as long as it’s temporary and intentional.

Every career has seasons of “doing what you have to.”

So do long breaks between jobs.
The key is not confusing a bridge with a destination.

🟦 Your Calling

Job you want: Yes

Job your ego wants: No

This is when you love the work but it doesn’t come with prestige.
Maybe the title’s smaller, maybe the company isn’t famous. But the work lights you up.

The challenge here isn’t changing jobs.
It’s telling your story so people understand the impact and meaning you bring.

Awareness Beats Assumptions

The point of the matrix isn’t judgment; it’s awareness.
When you understand why you’re drawn to a job — fulfillment, security, prestige, or identity — you can make better choices.

Sometimes that means staying where you are.
Sometimes it means changing direction.
But it always means moving with intention.

Take the Self-Assessment

I built a short self-assessment to help you see where your current job – or the one you’re considering – fits on the Job Fit Matrix.

It takes two minutes, and you’ll immediately see which quadrant you’re in.

👉 Take the Job Fit Matrix Assessment

Awareness creates choice.
Choice creates alignment.
And alignment – that’s where fulfillment begins.